Political Provocateur

A little ode to my addiction. Originally by Alexandra-the-great:

No one can understand what I am about to elaborate upon untill s/he drinks of coffee’s frothy goodness…so if you are a coffee virgin, don’t bother going on…

The use of coffee has become greatly extended. It has diffused itself among the mass of people and has become a considerable ingredient in their daily sustenance. For example, I orchestrate my mornings to the tune of coffee and, in my opinion, forever is the time it takes to brew the first pot of coffee in the morning.

The coffee falls into your stomach, and straightaway there is a general commotion. Ideas begin to move like battalions of the Grand Arms of the battlefield, and the battle takes place. Things remembered arrive at full gallops, ensuing to the wind. The light calvary of comparisons deliver a magnificent deploying charge, the artillery of logic hurry up with their train and ammunition, and the shafts of wit start up like sharpshooters. Similes arise, the paper is covered with ink; for the struggle commences and is concluded with torrents of black waters, just as a battle with powder

Suave molecules of mocha stir up your blood, without causing excess heat; the organ of thought recieves from it a feeling of symathy; work becomes easier and you will sit down without distress to your principle repast which will restore your body and afford you a calm, delicious day. Over second and third cups flow matters of high finance, high state, common gossip, and low comedy. Coffee is a social binder, a warmer of tongues, a soberer of minds, a stimulant of wit (I should know), a foiler of sleep if you want it so. From roadside mugs to the classic demi-tasse, it is the perfect democrat.

It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity. I bet this kind of thing does not happen to heroine addicts. I bet that when serious heroine addicts go to purchase their heroine, they do not tolerate waiting in line while some dilettante in front of them orders a hazelnut smack-a-cino with cinnamon sprinkles.

Don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy a good fancy drink once in a while, but just a plain cup of coffee is the finest organic suspension ever devised. Black coffee must be stong and very hot; if stong coffee does not agree with you, do not drink black coffee. And if you do not drink black coffee, do not drink coffee at all. However, I’ll quite agree that’s it’s difficult to quit coffee. It wouldn’t be easy drinking my Baileys straight, but I could possibly get used to it…or not

Ultimatly, everybody should believe in something. I believe I’ll have another coffee and, given enough, I could rule the world…

a tribute to coffee addiction:

Caffiene is my shepherd; I shall not dose.
It maketh me to wake in green pastures:
It leadeth me beyond the sleeping masses.
It restoreth my buzz.
It leadeth me in the paths of consciousness for it’s name sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of addiction.
I will fear no Equal:
For thou art with me; thy cream and thy sugar they comfort me.
Thou preparest a carafe before me in the presence of the Starbucks:
Thou anointest my day with pep; my mug runneth over.
Surely richness and taste shall follow me all the days of my life:
And I will dwell in the House of Mochas forever.